"If a woman was driven off the deep end - could it be a possibility that she was too close to the deep end in the first place? Maybe he nudged her a bit, and with her being a little tipsy on, say PBR, she just fell off. Maybe some should stay away from the deep end until they learn how to swim :) ?"
Ah. Yes. The alcohol induced topple into the deep end. Such a fun thing. Women are so much more susceptible to this too! Why is that? Because we're just not as physically equipped to process booze as men are? Because our natural reactions tend to be more of the emotional nature and PBR can amplify that?
We've all been witness to the train wreck that results from a chick with an under-the-surface emotional issue who starts drinking too much. Oh the tears, the snot, the whimpering! Oh the drama! Oh the easy lay!
Do you know you can do to prevent that, Chicks? Two things: addressing your drama while sober not pushing it down and not drinking too much when you're feeling emotional.
Do you know what you can do to prevent that, Guys? Nothing really except running for the hills. Sorry.
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It goes a little something like this:
Chick Brain Sober: I wonder what Man meant when he said "You never wear skirts and you look so good in skirts"
(Incidentally, this is man complimenting chick)
Chick Brain + 1 PBR: Maybe I should have worn a skirt tonight for our date.
Chick Brain + 2 PBR: Oh god, maybe he doesn't like my legs in jeans.
Chick Brain + 3 PBR: Must pee. (Walking to bathroom) OH GOD, is he watching me walk away and wishing that I had a skirt on? Oh shit, that chick has a skirt on. And she's sort of cute.
(Chick pees and spends a few minutes diligently staring at her ass and legs in the mirror and finding every fault with them she can)
Chick Brain + 4 PBR: He hates how I look in pants. Cute girl in skirt is right in his line of vision.
(Skirted Chick is standing in front of the big screen TV with the football game on)
Chick Brain + a 6-pack: I'm a slob! Man hates how I look. Man is looking at every other woman in the bar and wishing he was with them. (Sniffle, sniffle...sob...snot...gasp...)
And at that point chick does look like shit. Man confused. Chick swims around in deep end.
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So yes, JC, thanks for the thought. You're right. Many women do teeter on the edge of the deep end and I put it on the women to ensure that they either a) stick to the kiddie pool for a few weeks or b) wear their water wings.
That said JC, there's not a whole lot you can do about women who live their lives on the edge of the pool. But you can learn to recognize them and avoid them. Then look for the ones which are great partners in crime and its when the going gets tough that she topples off. And in those cases, you squeeze your eyes shut and wait until she sobers up and finds herself properly mortified.
Your friend in swimming,
-kat
2 comments:
See, sometimes my chick brain goes this direction. Other times, it goes "damn, gina, you look fiiiiiiine." Too bad we can't have the latter all the time. Oh wait, I guess that's called sobriety, and we all saw what that did to Fun Bobby.
Actually, I put myself in the rare club that when I drink I think I get hotter too. Its like I have beer goggles for myself.
Tequila makes me rampantly vain though...which is also intriguing.
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